I Live No More...

You are my Sunshine...

I exist in a World so dark that....... 
When you came as a ray of light.....
I was scared ....to even open my eyes.... cos they would hurt!! 

I didn't know what to say.... 
I fell short of words....

I didn't know how to feel....
I got rid of feelings...

I didn't know how to convey...
I forgot to express...

I didn't know how to love... 
I forgot being loved....

My tears became so shy...
That they too look for solitude...

The walls around me got so strong.....
That I forgot to become vulnerable....  

I fear... I just breathe .... but live no more!!


-EnigmaVision

I Live No More...

The Death of God...

The never ending demands/wants/desires of man

God was not killed once..... or twice!
He is killed everyday......Every moment.... every minute.... every second....

He was not killed by One.... or Someone....
He is killed by Everyone.....

It is said God is present in ALL of us....
...& as a part of that omnipresent being...
Whenever we kill others.... We kill God...
Whenever we kill ourselves...... We kill God.... 
Whenever we kill each other.... We kill God...

The dreams... the desires...... the needs... The love... the pain.... that make us.....
Whenever we kill these things.....in us as well as others... We kill God....

The soul.... The trust..... The sacrifice....
Whenever we kill these.... We kill God....

We kill God for quenching the thirst of power and greed....
We kill God for fulfilling our never ending wants or demands....
We kill God to create boundaries and walls....
We kill God when instead of believing in God we believe in religions...
We kill God when we don't Love but Fear God...
We kill God when we look within but find No God!!!

-EnigmaVision

Look within and see no God...

The Reflection...

The Reflection...

The reflection....... however real it may look......  is still just a reflection!!!

I looked into the waters...... 
Still water...... 
& saw my reflection.....

It was peaceful...... hence deceiving....
I tried to make it... a little real....
So, threw a stone at it..... to create ripples.... 

It looked better.....
As it became a somewhat similar reflection of my inner self....

After that....I just walked away....
.... & so did my reflection...!


-EnigmaVision

 

I am Falling Again.......

I am falling again.......& I like it....... 

Or not......... but I am falling again..... 

Is it that I am becoming weak again...........?!!

Is it that I am being trapped again...............?!!

 

I am scared that I am falling for the same you again........!!

Knowingly..........Unknowingly......

I am falling ..... falling again......

And I don’t want to lose control.......
....but I am losing control........
....& I fear... that I am falling again...



-EnigmaVision

I So Wanted to....

The Lonely Path...

I so wanted to love you.....
That it hardly mattered whether you are a man or a woman or something else.....


I so wanted to hold you.....
That it never mattered how........or to what extent.........  

I feel so lonely without you...

I so wanted to be with you..........
That it seemed futile to think of the miles between us...........




I so wanted to miss you..........
That you were there with me each and every moment.........Day and night..........Dawn to dusk......



Did I just say.......I wanted to?!!!

If you are with me then everything is beautiful and bright...

-EnigmaVision

Rain Rain Go Away....

It's raining inside and out!
The thoughts came flowing with it...
The words once blurred..
The memories, which were all washed away...
Hit me like a thunderbolt!
Questioning me about my whereabouts....
Leaving me with no explanations....


Maybe the rain could feel the rain inside me and hence could not stop!

Reigning my heart and ruining my existence was not enough that it came again?!

Those waters......that flowed down my cheeks..... were nothing but mere salt drops!
How much worth would mine be in that Ocean?!


"Rain rain go away...!", I said but then a voice within replied,"Not when people are enjoying!"
As in a few people dance to its rhythm. 
It is joy to them. A pleasure!
The lovers kiss each other on a rainy day.
Wet, wet is everything!
The feelings, the face, the lips... the clouds and the rain...
It isn't so bad when it rains!!


So what if it happened?! 
So what if I cried?!
So what if the rain never stops.......


-EnigmaVision

The Fire.......

The raging fire.....

 The fire in the forest can be extinguished  by the rain......

Fire in the world..... in the forest....

The same rain comes from the clouds........













The same clouds bring thunder and lightning.......

clouds and the rain...

 The same thunder and lightning, reminds us about the raging fire burning within us........


The same fire that is essential for our existence .......... 
.......as well as the cause of destruction.....!!


-EnigmaVision

The burning fire within ( inside) us....

Everything was White......

Everything seems white...

Everything was white..........

Everything was white.... except me!!

Except me......!!!



 -EnigmaVision

The Closed Hand...

The Eyes........

The eyes......

Eyes have a language of their own.........

It is a different world altogether.............

They say things which a person cannot..........

Reveal things which a person do not..............


A few maybe deprived of the physical eyes...........

......but everyone has an inner eye..........

The bright .........shiny........full of life eyes...

The happy eyes........




The peaceful .........soothing eyes.........




The loving eyes...........









The angry........resentful eyes........



The greedy....... jealous eyes..........






The sad eyes............

 

The thinking eyes................

The naughty........ flirty........... manipulative eyes.............

The vengeful eyes........

The sad..........regretful........ remorseful  eyes..................

The sinful............. seductive eyes..........

The lost........... dreamy.......... tired eyes.................

                                                           .......the playful eyes.........



I have seen it all..............

-EnigmaVision

Every Child has the Right to See the Clear Sky...

A few days back, I had a very strange dream................

It was not a usual, normal dream that we see everyday.... or... on a regular basis!
It was different..........
Very different from the ones that I usually see..........

There are a very few dreams that we remember....or could actually recall...
Clearly.......to the point...!!

I saw..........
I was at my old place/house.......... standing in the balcony.......... like the way I used to when I was a child...

I looked up in the sky and saw fighter planes and drones flying all around...........
I was frightened....

The very next moment I saw everything around me burned down and destroyed.................

Terrified.........I rushed inside..... to see whether everyone in my family was alright!!!

To my relief, everyone was fine............

The terrible situation led us to flee.........

After struggling for days .........
We reached a remote, peaceful place.........where we took shelter in a religious and charitable institution.

We thought that we were safe there......... but .... to our horror....... found out that in an emergency situation like this....... No place is safe!!!

The very next moment ...even that building was the target of a missile!!!
All the innocent people, monks and saints who were inside the building died!!

We were still alive because we were outside..... & were horrified to see such a thing happen in front of our eyes......!!

The terrible series of such events continued.......
....... and we continued running from one place to the other.........


Throughout the dream......... one thing that did not leave my mind.......not even for a second......
...and that was....FEAR!!!
Fear of loosing the near and dear ones........ fear of death....... fear of loosing everything.......fear of not knowing what is going to happen next......... fear of loosing peace of mind......forever......


This dream left me wondering ...... What happens to or goes on in the mind of those small children..... stuck in a situation like this.... ??!!!
When they look up ....... They don't see the clear sky........
They don't see the flying birds.......
They don't see the shining stars or the moon........
....and fall asleep.....peacefully......!!!!
They see TERROR!!! ONLY TERROR!!!

Is this what we want to give our future generation?!!!

Every child in the world has the RIGHT to see the clear sky and it is our duty and responsibility to give them that.

War and destruction of any form has given us nothing!!! No country has gained...... No country will gain!!
How many examples do we need?!!!

They just bring chaos in peoples' lives ....... and a feeling of revenge in others....!!!
Initiated from the minds of a few power thirsty people......so that they can gain more power ..... more control....... more wealth ........leading to negativity and destruction everywhere!!!

-EnigmaVision

The Haunted House...........

Today I am feeling so nostalgic..................

I am at a place.......... a house......kinda haunted...... which is more than three hundred years old........... Yes more than 3 centuries!!! (Maybe 4....... not sure....!!!)
 

 People say that it was owned by some king......... So it is not just a house........... but a palace.......

 It just feels great to be here.. !!!
 Everything is hazy .......... Unknown...............

So many people must have lived here..........
So many stories........... tragedies........... must have taken place....
All history now ...........
Or maybe not.......
Maybe they are still alive.......... inside the four walls of this palace..........


The walls.......... The arches........... The doors........ The windows........ Everything has its own story ....... & memories to share

 It seems as if the trees........ plants......... covering this place......  is also adding to its mystery!!!

They too are protecting...... or rather say trying to help .......  keep its serenity intact....!

 So many people must have looked through this window...............

 Suddenly I realized that this place is not just habituated by mysterious walls......... stories.......stairs........ghosts......... trees.........but also snakes...... the large venomous ones!!!

As I walked the lonely paths..... through the green grasses.......... I noticed something move..... At first I thought it was just a stick .......... The next moment I realized..... it was a snake... almost a six foot long  king cobra!!!

I was just one step away from death................. Cos I happened to have crossed  its path!!!

I stood there..... still.......... for more than a minute......... paying respect to none but the king of snakes.....

The rush that passed through my veins cannot be described ............ For a moment... even death seemed futile...!!

Death stared at me........... and seeing no fear in my eyes.............
Left me alone.........

Yes........... Even death left me alone........

 ........and I kept wondering........... & wandering through the timeless beauty of that place..........

I was Lost........... & for the first time ...this feeling of being lost was not killing me....!!!

In fact... it felt wonderful........soothing........ peaceful.........

I realized that...... Even the feeling of not knowing what is going to happen next can be so addictive!!!

 - EnigmaVision

The Rainbow......

Scientifically, we all know how a rainbow is formed. The seven colors that we see is nothing but what our main source of light (i.e. the Sun) is made of! Well known as the VIBGYOR (Violet, Indigo, Blue, Green, Yellow, Orange and Red).

As per the definition, it is an optical and meteorological phenomenon that is caused by reflection of light in water droplets in the Earth's atmosphere resulting in a spectrum of light appearing in the sky. Also, it can be viewed from a particular angle.

 Life is no less than a rainbow. Our life also consists of different colors represented by the different phases, different emotions (love, jealousy, hurt, vengeance etc)   and the various situations (happy, sad, peaceful etc) that we go through.

Like the rainbow, life is no more but an illusion. It too depends on the angle from which we view it!

Trying to Capture the Moment... Forever...

I am trying to capture this moment in my eyes ........as a forever thing.......... cos I don't know how long I will be in this place.........

This place......... which has become a part of me.............. Some sort of definition....

As I see the deep..........gray............ light clouds passing by.........

The ones which rose above..........as they already showered somewhere............. ready to shower... some place else......

I can feel the cool moist breeze touching my face.............. Touching me........... My entire being.........

I am actually breathing it............ cos I want to capture it all!!!

This is a feeling which is so not possible to describe in words...........

Far away from the physical realm and realities of life........... accentuating my entire existence.........

-EnigmaVision

I Live in a Dream World....

I live in a dream world..... known as  the Dreamland.......

Playing with the birds..... dancing among the waves....... flying  above the clouds...... 

Yes.......My life is no less than a dream........ 

........but dreams are not always good......  

......  sometimes we have nightmares too.... the scary....... bad ones........ 

.......Causing meaningless pain or misery....... fear & suffering........


 -EnigmaVision